


Heatwave

by to_dorothy



Category: Legacies (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, Chronic Illness, F/F, Fluff and Angst, One Shot, Other, Recreational Drug Use, Sad, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:22:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27007300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/to_dorothy/pseuds/to_dorothy
Summary: It's hot.Josie can feel the soles of her sandals softening in the heat, the rubber sticking to the pavement as she walks. The back of her neck burns from the mid afternoon sun as summer beats down tirelessly, blending with the still air to form a thick cocoon of heat around her.A fic inspired by "Heatwave" by Snail Mail
Relationships: Hope Mikaelson & Penelope Park, Hope Mikaelson/Penelope Park, Penelope Park & Josie Saltzman, Penelope Park/Josie Saltzman
Comments: 17
Kudos: 83





	Heatwave

**Author's Note:**

> So, to be clear, this is definitely a Henelope fic but it's Josie-centric. 
> 
> The M is for drug use.

_It's hot._

_Josie can feel the soles of her sandals softening in the heat, the rubber sticking to the pavement as she walks. The back of her neck burns from the mid afternoon sun as summer beats down tirelessly, blending with the still air to form a thick cocoon of heat around her._

_"Josie!"_

_She hears her name being called in the background followed by the quick patter of feet. She turns, her hands against her hips and lips already twitching into a mild frown._

_“Should you even be running in this weather?” she says as the loud slap of Penelope barefoot on the pavement comes closer and closer and closer until Penelope is there, panting by her side trying to catch her breath, grinning broadly._

_“Caught you”_

_Josie lips quirk upwards while something tugs sadly on her heart. Her face is turned towards Penelope, letting her gaze wander over Penelope’s face until Josie’s eyes are focused on the ground that's radiating heat, washing her body in an uncomfortable warmth._

_"Penelope.” she says “Where are your shoes?"_

_Penelope huffs loudly, strands of her hair slick with sweat sticks to her forehead. She looks ridiculous in her starched shirt, track shorts and bare feet._

_Josie has never seen anything so beautiful._

_“It’s not important” Penelope grabs her hand and twines their fingers together. Her hands are sticky from perspiration. Josie squeezes Penelope’s hand gently and they walk together, the path before them distorting and flickering before them in the heat._

  


Josie wakes up with a groan, her head aching from the dull rhythmic onset of a throbbing hangover. Elusive remnants of her dream hover in her mind. She struggles to grasp at it, but can only remember flickers of Penelope’s smiling face in a muggy haze. 

Her bedroom is hot and stifling as the heatwave drags into its fourth day. She groans again and kicks off the blankets covering her legs. Looking down she realises she's still wearing yesterday's clothes, stale and sour from sweat, smoke and alcohol. 

Josie crawls out of bed and stares longingly at the rumpled sheets of her unmade bed. As much as she'd like to lay back down and sleep away the repressive heat she can't. 

She's seeing Penelope today. 

She leaves her room and wades sloppily through the thick heat in her apartment. Her head is still aching as she makes her way to the small kitchenette where piles of unwashed dishes are stacked neatly by the kitchen sink. Like the rest of her home, it's unreasonably hot. Josie can already feel beads of sweat forming on the small of her back as she begins rinsing an unwashed mug while a small pot of coffee bubbles away merrily in her stove. She leans her head against the cool counters in lieu of getting changed out of last night’s clothes as she waits for her coffee to finish percolating. 

She quickly downs the bitter, scalding coffee and leaves the apartment. The air is hot and heavy and it drapes itself over the city, seeping into buildings and pavement that emits the heat of summer back onto its inhabitants. Josie hurries down the street of her towards the train station, before pausing briefly at the florist at the end of her street. The clerk, a young teenage boy, flashes her a smile in recognition as she pays for her flowers. 

She clutches the posy of creamy pink musk roses, Penelope's favourite flowers, to her chest and hurries towards the train station entrance. Josie doesn't need to check her phone to know she's running late. 

"Again" she mentally chides herself as she reaches the station. The red brick entrance is unwelcoming and littered with rubbish. The dirty brick wall is hot to the touch, dispersing the herd of commuters who usually idle outside. 

Josie quickly slips past the barrier and just manages to squeeze through the doors of her train before it leaves the platform. The carriage she's in is mostly empty, except for a young teenage couple who ignore her, too caught up in each other, and an elderly woman with shockingly alabaster skin and a pink streak in her hair. 

The old lady eyes her and smiles. Josie feels self conscious and futilely smooths the front of her rumpled yellow sundress sticking to her sweaty skin, but still, she smiles back and takes a seat nearby. 

"It's hot isn't it?" The old lady says loudly in a thick Brooklyn accent over the rattle of the carriage. She’s dressed in white khaki shorts and a souvenir shirt with a picture of a festive beachfront and Florida in large cursive font. 

"Mmm" Josie hums in agreement. 

They fall into a short comfortable silence. All the while Josie can feel the gaze of the old lady scrutinising her, not unkindly, as the train rattles forward. The young couple get off at the third station, leaving the carriage empty except for Josie and the old woman, who speaks to her again. 

"Pretty flowers you've got there. From your boyfriend?" 

"Oh. No, I, um” Josie says haltingly. She can feel her cheeks flush as she fumbles through her words. 

“I bought them for a friend. I'm going to see her today." Josie splutters out lamely, cringing at herself. 

“Well she must be a good friend if you're bringing her flowers in this heat" 

Josie laughs awkwardly. 

“Well, she’s my best friend” 

“That is so sweet. I’d do anything for my best gal too” the old lady leans forward in her seat, looking delighted as her eyes flicker between Josie and the flowers in her lap. 

“I’m Harley by the way.” Harley reaches out a hand with a bright fluorescent pink manicure that was beginning to chip at the tips. 

“I’m Josie.” she says as she takes Harley’s hand. The skin is surprisingly soft, and the handshake is unsurprisingly firm. 

Harley’s grins, it’s wild and feral, but there is a light playful sparkle in her eyes. 

“So Josie, where’re ya getting off?” Harley asks, her voice loud and bright over the clanging sound of the train. 

“Mystic Falls” Josie answers. 

“Oh, that’s ages away! Gives us time to gal talk about besties. So, how’d you meet?” 

Harley’s broad grin stretches impossibly wider and Josie smiles back just as widely as she remembers the first summer when she met Penelope. 

“We actually met when I was fourteen in the emergency room...” 

* * *

14.

  


Josie jitters her leg up and down in the waiting room chair as she peers around anxiously, waiting for her dad to come back with Lizzie. The white walls and bright fluorescent lights of the paediatric unit contrasts starkly with her bright yellow shorts splattered with flecks of dried brown spots of blood. 

_Lizzie’s blood_

Josie tenses as she remembers Lizzie running after her as she dashed excitedly towards the blue water in their first summer visit to the pools. She remembers vividly, laughter followed by quick succession of sounds. 

A sharp crack, silence and screaming. 

Though everyone assured her it was not her fault, guilt still gnawed at her. Especially as she remembers Lizzie's pale face, and the blood gushing from the cut on her forehead onto the blue painted concrete of Mystic Falls Public Pools. The reminder makes her heart knit and wind itself into a tight little knot in her chest. She casts glances every few moments at the bright white door that Lizzie was rushed through by stern looking doctors, hoping for a glimpse of her sister or dad. 

As she glances towards the door for the umpteenth time, something blocks her vision. It’s a girl her age who seems to inspect Josie curiously up and down before nodding her head. She walks up to Josie and confidently sticks out a hand  


“I’m Penelope. Are you ok?” 

Josie looks up wide eyed at the girl. 

"What are you doing here? Are you by yourself?" 

Josie continues to stare silently at this green eyed girl in front of her. 

"Can you talk?" Penelope says with a frown pulling her hand back. 

"Y-yes" Josie finally finds her voice and clears her throat. 

“Oh, phew. That could’ve been awkward. You looked like you were going to start crying so I thought I'd see if you were ok" 

She looks at the girl in front of her and takes her in, trying and failing to distract herself from thoughts of her sister. The girl stood in front of her back straight. Her black hair came down into a short bob, framing a pale face and sharp green eyes. She was dressed in pyjamas with cats on them and a tube twisted out of her left wrist into an IV bag on a rolling stand. 

As Josie stares wide eyed at her, Penelope shuffles her feet before coughing wetly with a grimace and asking. 

“So why are you here?” 

"I'm waiting for my sister. She fell and hit her head and needs to get stitches..." Josie trails off as her breath quickens at the thought. Penelope must feel her rising panic because she bends and places her hand gently on Josie's shoulder while giving her a gentle smile. 

"Hey, look at me, that's it. Just take some deep breaths ok? As many as you need. I promise it will help" Penelope says solemnly. 

Josie begins breathing slowly, as she tries to suppress the panic. She feels Penelope pull at her hand, until their fingers are tangled together. 

Penelope begins talking, and Josie leans into her voice distracting herself from her own guilt and panic as she listens to Penelope’s rambles. 

“I’m in because I have a cold. Honestly, who gets a cold in summer? It’s so hot you’d think all the sick would just take a break you know? Like summer vacay for the flu? I’m sure they could do with a break. I mean, I’d like a break. But whatever, it’s really not a big deal, but my ma’s worried so here I am” Penelope says while rolling her eyes. 

She sits down on the seat beside Josie and grins at her. Josie smiles back shyly. 

"Anyway, like I said. I'm Penelope. What's your name?" 

"Josette. But everyone calls me Josie" 

“Well let me tell you something Josie, hospitals are boring” Josie politely hums in agreement, even if she disagrees. 

_Hospitals are frightening_

Penelope is still talking, rapidly listing off the things she hates about hospitals. _There's always beeping everywhere, there’s nothing interesting to do...God, don’t get me started on the food…_

Josie tries to focus on her voice, but finds her mind wandering as she sits there thinking about Lizzie, and surreptitiously peering around for any sign of her dad. After a while she notices a silence, and she turns to find Penelope looking at her with a small smile, amusement in her eyes. 

“What?” Josie says wide eyed 

Penelope just laughs 

"I said, what do you do for fun?" 

"Oh, um. I read a lot" 

Penelope nods at her to continue, and she finds herself telling Penelope about the books she reads, the movies she and Lizzie watch and her favourite subjects at school. Penelope listens to her intently with wide eyed fascination. Josie slowly finds herself slowly relaxing around the strange young girl beside her. She trails off in the middle of her explanation of her last summer trip to the beach when a tall harried looking woman with dark hair and green eyes appears in front of them followed closely by a nurse. 

"Penelope! I've been looking everywhere for you!" 

“Oh! Hey mum, sorry." Josie could almost laugh at how Penelope’s earlier confidence suddenly disappears as she hunches over forming a small awkward girl fidgeting in the chair beside her. 

Penelope clears her throat. 

"This is Josie, she’s my new friend.” she shoots her mother finger guns, with one hand while still holding Josie’s hand in the other. 

“Look at me, making friends” and despite the tightness around her mother’s eyes, she smiles warmly at Penelope. 

“Good job Penny, but that still doesn’t excuse you running off. Now get back to your room, Dr. Tigg is waiting for you.” She pauses before smirking at her daughter 

“You can have a playdate with your new friend later” 

Penelope splutters, “I’m fourteen, I don’t have playdates. I...I hang out!” 

Penelope’s mother's, smirk deepens. Josie can see the resemblance in the way her mother’s eyes sparkle a deep green as she replies. 

“Of course, my mistake dear” she turns to Josie and glances down at their hands, still clasped together. Josie shrinks a little under her gaze and let’s go of Penelope’s hand. 

Penelope turns to Josie with a small frown on her lips glancing at her now empty hand and asks almost timidly. 

“Do you wanna hang out?” 

Josie fidgets awkwardly under the gaze of Penelope and her mother, and gives a small nod. Penelope beams at her and begins to launch into another rambling speech about _Summer fun buddies_ , when she is interrupted by her mother. 

“Josie, Penelope needs to go, but here is our number. I’m sure Penelope would love to have a playdate with you soon, so please get in touch” she hands Josie a business card. 

_Margaret A. Park_ is embossed into the thick cream card. Josie clutches it in her hand staring wide eyed at Penelope and her mother. 

“Mom! Stop embarrassing me” Penelope says, as she allows herself to be dragged away by her mother. 

Before disappearing down a brightly lit hospital corridor, Penelope turns and waves at her. Josie smiles shyly and waves back, card still clutched tightly in her hand. 

  


* * *

"... And then I found out she ran away from her doctor because she was bored! I ended up meeting her very worried mother who was tearing down the hospital looking for her" 

Harley laughs, it's deep and hearty. 

"She sounds like quite the troublemaker" 

“Oh, definitely. She was always getting us into trouble when we were younger.” 

Harley grins at her. 

“It’s important to have special people like that in our lives” 

"Oh she is. She's very special. The specialist" Josie says it with a laugh. It's light and filled with an easy joy as she thinks of Penelope. 

* * *

15.

  


Penelope and Josie are sitting side by side in silence. The heat of summer blankets over them, and Josie hunches her back under its weight. Penelope is fiddling with the straw of her protein shake (“Doc says I gotta gain weight, and my digestive tract is conspiring against me JoJo”). 

She takes small sips of it every now and then, grimacing at the taste. Grimaces that Josie studiously tries to ignore as she pretends to be mad at her. 

"Josie..." It's a whine. Josie hides a smile behind a stern face. 

"Come on Josie. You have to forgive me. You love me, I'm special. The specialist" 

Josie finally cracks and starts laughing. 

"A specialist at being a pain in the ass." 

"So you forgive me?" Penelope pouts, while still managing to keep her doe eyes. It makes Josie huff, half in exasperation and half in utter fondness of the girl in front of her. 

" I wish you didn't egg her on so much Penny. She's my sister" 

“If this is about the hair dye…” 

“She’s had blue hair for a week!” 

"Yeah well, she embarrassed you in front of the school because Raf asked you out!" 

"She doesn’t mean it. She's just...she’s just going through a phase" 

Penelope scoffs, "Yeah, if becoming the demon queen of Mystic Falls is _just a phase_ " 

Josie glares half heartedly at her until Penelope let’s out a long suffering huff. 

"Ok, ok. I won’t put dye in her conditioner again” Penelope pauses, before smirking “I’m sure I can find somewhere else instead" 

“Penny!” 

“Sorry” Penelope says, not sounding the least bit repentant. 

"No your not" 

"No, I'm not" 

"I hate you" 

"I know" Penelope says laughing, her green eyes twinkling with mischief, the straw twirling between her fingers. 

  


* * *

Harley waves one hand animatedly, whilst wiping at the sweat collecting on her brow with her other. 

"... And then she throws her drink in his face, grabs my hand and legs it. And that's how I met my Pammy" Harley says finishing with a flourish of her hands and a dazzling smile. 

There’s a small lull of silence as the train screeches to a slow jittery stop at the next station. Waves of hot air that billow in as carriage doors open to let passengers on and off. 

"Seems like both our gals are trouble" 

Josie's face is warm, as she thinks of Penelope as _her girl._

* * *

16.

  


It’s evening. 

The air conditioning to the Parks house is broken, still air mingles with the summer heat until the house is sweltering. Josie and Penelope have pulled Penelope’s mattress into the backyard for a sleepover and are laying side by side, letting the soft glow of the setting sun wash over them. 

Summer had reached its apex, with a succession of hot nights and hotter days. Despite the heat radiating from Penelope’s body, Josie still burrows into the crook of her neck. 

Mrs Park had left town earlier that day, with a gentle pat on the cheek, and gentler warning to behave. A warning Penelope chooses to studiously ignore as she blows tendrils of smoke into the warm summer evening. The smell of weed wafts along the stilled currents of the night mixing with the thick and sweet smell of jasmine and fresh cut grass. 

The weightless silence is broken by Penelope’s sudden coughing fit. Josie frowns at her in concern and plucks the joint dangling between her fingers with a frown. 

"You really should stop smoking" she says as she fiddles with the joint between two fingers. 

Penelope arches an eyebrow, and Josie rolls her eyes and takes a deep toke of the joint dangling between her fingers 

"Hypocrite" 

"Whatever Penny." 

Penelope laughs, reaches for the joint and sets it aside in an ashtray next to the mattress. 

Penelope brings an arm around Josie and takes a few slow steady breathes. 

The sun has disappeared into the horizon, filling the backyard with darkness and a warm comfortable silence that pillows around them. Josie can feel her eyes getting heavy as she settles into Penelope’s warmth. She can feel Penelope’s fingers, trail and shift patterns along her back, and she feels so comfortable it slips out of her mouth before she can stop it. 

“Thanks for being my girl” 

She stills as she registers her words, but Penelope doesn’t, she lets her fingers shift and continue their aimless path along her spine and hums. 

“Of course. You’re my best friend JoJo. I’ll always be your girl” 

Penelope smiles and kisses the crown of Josie’s head. It makes a warmth well up and spread across Josie’s body, comforting and so unlike the hot unmoving air around them. The warm chatter of summer - crickets chirping, the neighbours’ laughter two houses down - fill the background, weaving itself with the soft sounds of breathing. Josie let’s herself melt into Penelope’s arms. 

  


* * *

Harley gets off two stops before her. They wave at each other, and she tells Josie again, that she's a good friend. 

After another two stops Josie gets off the train. A tattered and neglected sign tells her she’s arrived at Mystic Falls. The station is empty and unshaded, making the sun seem hot and harsh after the relative cool of the train carriage. She leaves the station veering sharply into a suburban street filled with houses and big plane trees. They cast a shade dappled by the sunlight filtering through the leaves. It offers a small break from the sun, but not from the overbearing heat. She passes houses with dry yellow lawns, until she comes to a low brick wall with a wrought iron gate that comes up to her waist. Behind the gate are neatly trimmed lawns and a small dirt path, small cracks littered through it from the dry heat. Josie walks down the path stomach churning as she gets closer until... 

Josie comes to a small patch of grass, and she kneels down. She places the flowers on the ground before looking up, a little smile gracing her lips. She reaches out, and places a hand on the gravestone in front of her. It's cool, as if it's trying to offer her comfort and respite 

"Hey Penny. I missed you" 

* * *

17.

  


Josie was pacing in her room. Back and forth and back and forth. She nibbles her lower lip, until it finally bursts out. 

"I'm going to tell her" it's loud, too loud in her small empty room. Josie feels her cheeks warm in embarrassment. 

"I'm going to tell her" Josie says more quietly "I'm going to tell her I love her" 

Everything is still for a moment before she throws her hands up, covering her face. 

"Oh god, I can't" Josie doesn't even know how long she stands there until she feels a buzzing in her back pocket. She rolls her eyes as she pulls out her phone, expecting Lizzie badgering her for a ride. 

"I'm not picking you up again." 

There’s a low chuckle, that's decidedly not her sister's. 

"Well, I can come get you I suppose. I have something to tell you" Penelope's voice is quiet and warm, and it makes Josie feel everything. 

"Me too" she blurts out, before she can stop herself. 

"Ok. See you in 10?" 

"Ok, see you in 10." 

  


She's sitting on the stoop of the front porch. The setting sun casts a soft white glow and she shivers in the dry heat of the summer evening. 

Her legs bouncing up and down again and again as she waits. Penelope's car rolls up the front of the house and she watches her get out and wave when they make eye contact. Penelope locks her car and walks up the dirt path of her front yard, leaving little plumes of dust. Her movements carefree, and her eyes shine like emeralds as the sun sets behind her, casting a halo of light around her. She stops in front of Josie giving her a kiss on the cheek before grinning and blowing a raspberry on the other. 

"Oh my god Penny. Why" Josie exclaims, wiping at her face with her jumper. Penelope just cackles as she plops herself down next to Josie. The step they're sitting on is narrow, so they're pressed up right next to each other. Penelope throws her arm around Josie. 

"So you have something to say to me, Miss Saltzman?" 

Josie groans. "Nope, I don't. Dunno what you're talking about. How was Dr Tigg? Is she well?" Josie cringes at her own words but Penelope just laughs. 

"She’s fine Josie,” she laughs again, making her eyes twinkle “Now what did you want to say to me?” 

"You go first Penny, it's not important" Penelope reaches out with the arm that isn't wrapped around her to touch her face, eyes soft as she slowly strokes her cheek. Josie leans into the softness of Penelope's hands and feels the breath leave her lungs, seeping into the quiet of dusk. 

"Josie, you can tell me if you want to. Or not. It doesn't matter, ok?" 

And it's the warmth radiating from Penelope, in her voice, her eyes, and her touch that makes Josie feel so, so much. 

"I love you. N-not as my best friend even though you are. You’re my best friend and I do love you as my best friend too, but I love you like...more." she feels her cheeks flush as her ramble trails off. 

Penelope is silent, but her arms are still around Josie, her hands still on her face. When she speaks it’s soft, slow and sad. 

"I'm sorry JoJo. I - “ she pauses, “I don’t feel the same.” 

And Josie wants to tear her eyes away, but she can’t as Penelope looks at her softly, hand now stroking her face. 

“I wish that it wasn't like this, that I felt the same, because you're perfect, and someday you'll make someone so, so happy. You're everything, and I hope we can still be friends" 

Josie feels heart shatter with a muted crack. She wants to run away, but she doesn't. Because having Penelope as a friend is worth the pain, than not having Penelope at all. 

"Of course, Penny. You're my best friend.” She tries to plaster on a smile, even though it feels alien on her face “So what did you want to tell me?" 

Penelope grimaces. 

“I met someone. Her name’s Hope” 

  


* * *

“I saw Hope last week” 

Josie’s voice is light and conversational as she leans against the cool marble of Penelope’s gravestone. 

“She said she’s going to try and visit you soon, but her new job has been keeping her busy” 

The grass is dry and brittle beneath her, and her head is still pounding like it was in the morning. She feels the sharp dried blades of grass, pricking against her skin like dull brown pins and sinks into the feeling of melancholy and the Penelope shaped hole in her heart. 

She shuts her eyes, head against Penelope's headstone. The heat of the summer surrounds her like a crucible, she feels herself cracking as tears form behind her closed eyes. 

* * *

18.

  


Josie doesn’t get to meet Hope for a long time. In fact, with the stress filled whirlwind of her final year of school, exams, Hope’s boarding school and Penelope's hospital visits there never seemed to be the time until almost a year later at a house party during the last summer break before college. It’s hot and the backyard is already filled with noise, sweaty teens and the promise of an uncertain future and growing up. 

She’s only been there for half an hour, but someone’s already spilt warm beer on her and she wants to leave. The only thing stopping her is Penelope’s hand squeezing tightly around hers as they wait for Hope to show up. 

“That’s her” Penelope says excitedly, dropping her hand and rushing towards a short redhead walking towards them. 

Josie fidgets uncomfortably as she watches them kiss chastely. Josie plasters on a smile and walks over and extends her hand toward Hope. 

“Hope, this is Josie. She’s my best friend” 

"Hi Josie, Penelope's told me so much about you" Hope flashes her a warm grin. 

"She talks about you non-stop actually" 

Josie flushes, from the corner of her eye she sees Penelope do the same. It's betrayed by the happy glint in Penelope's eye and soft smile. She wants to hate her, but she can’t, not with the way Penelope’s eyes glow with a faint lustre of happiness. Not when her body softens as she leans into Hope’s side, and not when Penelope looks at her, eyes darting anxiously between Hope and Josie, waiting for her to say something. 

"Well Penny talks about you non-stop too. It’s really great to meet you Hope” 

Penelope's face lights with a smile. Seeing it fills Josie with happiness, that's dulled by a heated stab of mournful envy as she watches Penelope take Hope by the hand and lead her towards the kitchen. 

"Come on. Let’s grab some drinks" 

Josie watches as they walk away, feeling sorry for herself, until Penelope turns to her and smiles. 

"You coming?" 

Josie nods, she’d always follow Penelope. 

  


Summer was supposed to be ending, allowing fall to trickle in and temper the end of summer heat with crisp winds and showers. 

However, to Josie, this summer seemed endless. The dry heat lasted an eternity, stretching across streets, seeping into houses and dried out and dusty lawns. 

Josie’s walking down the driveway of the Park’s house, a heavy box in hand, sweat forming small rivulets down her back. A few leaves had turned already, and crunch against the boiling concrete driveway underneath her foot. Behind her she can hear the rattle of Penelope’s suitcase. 

“Oof” Josie, grunts as she drops the box next to the trunk of the car. 

“You’re telling me” Penelope slightly breathless as she pulls to a stop next to Josie. 

She looks slightly pale, and Josie frowns at her. 

“You good Penny?” 

“God. Dragging this stupid crap around is probably going to kill me before good ol’ cystic fibrosis does” Penelope says breathlessly, her face pale and tallow despite the exertion. 

Josie frowns at Penelope, before pulling Penelope close by the lapels of her black jacket until they’re so close, Josie can feel the slight stutter in Penelope’s breath. Penelope looks at her, with waggling her eyebrows with a playful smile 

Josie rolls her eyes as she reaches into Penelope’s pocket, feeling around until her hands wrap around metal and plastic. She gives it a good shake, before popping the lid off with her thumb and holding the inhaler to Penelope’s face with practiced ease. 

Penelope snorts and opens her mouth, letting Josie place the inhaler inside her mouth. A small smile plays at the edge of Josie’s lips as she watches Penelope take a puff. 

“It’s so weird that you can do that without talking” 

Josie blushes and takes a small step back. She turns to see Hope standing behind her with a large box holding the airway clearance vest. She cocks her head to the side watching them. 

“ShupUmpfHoe” Penelope says, the inhaler still in her mouth. 

“What was that babe?” 

“I said shut up Hope” Penelope says, pulling the inhaler from her mouth “You’re just jealous you’re not my bestie.” 

Hope laughs as she closes the gap between them and places the box gently on the ground next to the other items. 

“I think that’s everything Penny?” Josie says, Penelope looks around. 

“Looks like it. Meds, energy bars and gross shakes, more meds and my chest thingy” she says, pointing at large box Hope put down 

“Looks like I’m all college ready” 

“Great, let’s hit the road Jack!” Hope says to Penelope stepping around her towards the driver side. As she climbs into the car she flashes Josie a bright grin. 

“Thanks for the help Josie. Dunno how Pen’s going to stay out of trouble without you around” 

Penelope huffs, but looks at her fondly at Hope as she climbs into the car. She turns back to Josie, and they stand together. The heat fills the air around them forming a wall as they watch each other silently for a moment before Penelope moves first and wraps Josie in a fierce hug. 

“I’m going to miss you so much JoJo” 

Josie holds her back just as tightly, she can feel her eyes water. 

“I’m going to miss you too Penny. Call me when you get there" 

She breathes in Penelope a final time, before letting her climb in the passenger seat next to Hope. 

She watches them drive down the street and away. 

  


* * *

She leans her head against Penelope's gravestone. She can feel a small sob forming, that she quickly stifles by breathing in sharply. Her eyes are still closed as she listens to her breathing and the quiet murmur of the other mourners in the cemetery. 

“I miss you” her voice is cracked and shaky. “So, so much” 

* * *

19.

  


It’s the first summer break back from college and Josie is excited to be back home. As soon as she opened the front door she was engulfed in a hug by Lizzie, who chattered at her about art school and her new college boyfriend. Some guy called Milton. 

After a few moments of Lizzie’s excited talk and her father’s warm smiles, she excused herself to her bedroom to begin unpacking when her phone rings. She looks down at her phone and smiles as an image of Penelope, nose wrinkled in thought, pops up on her screen. 

“Hey Penny. Finally sick of all your poser friends and decided to call your one true bestie?” 

She hears a low chuckle on the other end of the phone. 

“No, I just wanted to see what you were up to” 

“Just unpacking, not too busy for you” She sets down the shirt she was folding and sits on her bed 

“Are you too busy to check your door?” 

There’s a knock on Josie’s door and Josie drops her phone. She rushes to the door and flings it open. Penelope is on the other side dressed in almost scandalously short tennis skirt and a white tank top, she’s holding flowers. Despite the burst of joy at seeing Penelope again, Josie frowns slightly as she takes in Penelope's tired appearance. Her eyes seem bruised with lack of sleep and she looks like she's lost weight 

“Welcome home JoJo” 

Penelope kisses her on the cheek, hands her the flowers, flips her hair and walks into Josie’s room and settles herself comfortably on her bed. She leans back on her arm and looks very comfortable and smug. 

“I thought you weren’t coming back for another week” 

“Yeah well, Emma wanted to see me, aaaaaand” Penelope draws the last word out with a large grin “I missed your pretty little face of course” 

Josie laughs at Penelope. It’s easy and familiar and she’s happy she’s home. 

  


Summer break seemed to have passed so quickly and now it’s evening to the last day before Josie needs to head back to the quiet rigor of college and dusty dorms. 

The air is syrupy and filled with the sound of crickets. Josie watches a small family of moths tapping against the porchlight from the puddle of blankets she and Penelope had hauled into the backyard to lie on. She looks at Penelope lying by her side and is overcome by a quiet sense of nostalgia. 

“This reminds me of being sixteen again, having sleepovers in your backyard” 

Penelope hums as she rummages on the bare grass beside her for a glass of water. She curses a little when she spills it, making Josie laugh. 

“Here” Josie says, handing her her bottle. Penelope smiles gratefully as she swallows the small handful of pills with the water. 

Penelope is quiet. Distracted, like she has been all summer. Josie knows she’s been trying to hide it, but she can see it in the far off gaze in Penelope’s eyes in quiet moments like this. 

"Hey JoJo. I have something to tell you." 

It's low and serious and it makes Josie’s heart clench. 

"What's wrong" concern. Josie turns her face to Penelope, who’s staring right back at her 

"I’m...My lungs" Penelope’s words stutter to a halt and she sighs in the darkness 

“They've put me onto the transplant list. It'll be ok, but I'm going to take a year off school.” 

There’s a short pause, that’s filled only with the sound of quiet breathing and the hum of crickets, before Penelope continues 

“Hope asked me to move into an apartment with her to be a little closer” 

_Because I'm sick_ , goes unspoken between them, making it seem heavier and more terrifying in the dark. 

The sound of the crickets bleeds into the fraught silence between them. Josie doesn’t know what to do and for the first time in their years of friendship she feels afraid of really losing Penelope. She wants to say something, but she doesn’t know what. Instead she lets her breath catch in her throat and she reaches for Penelope’s hand and squeezes it tight. 

  


* * *

“Sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe without you here.” 

Josie can warm droplets of tears sliding down her face. She pauses and draws in a deep breath of hot air that seems to thicken in her chest as the skies above darken. 

* * *

20.

  


Penelope squirms underneath her, as Josie looks nervously down at her hands that are on Penelope's chest. 

"Is this ok?" She says softly. 

"Mmm, yeah. Just give me a bit to get comfortable" 

There's a few more minutes of squirming before Penelope grunts in satisfaction, and looks up at Josie with a smile. 

"Ok, you can start now" 

The room is hot and humid, which somehow puts Josie even more on edge. Penelope notices and cups her face smiling gently. 

"We don't have to do it if you don't want to" 

"No I do" Josie says, shaking her head violently. 

She begins massaging Penelope's chest, face turning a bright red. 

"Can you go a little harder?" 

Josie nods, kneading into Penelope’s breast while Penelope is completely still underneath her letting out small quiet gasps of air. She sits up suddenly and begins coughing violently and hacks up some mucus that she spits into a tissue Josie quickly passes her. She turns again and Josie passes her the respirator connected to the oxygen tank next to her bed. 

Penelope expertly hangs it off her face, it makes her look alien. So different to the Penelope she remembers a summer ago. 

Penelope grimaces and doesn't meet her eye. Josie lets her, giving her a moment by gazing over the small apartment cluttered with clothes folded and piled on armchairs, small messes of medicine on the chest of drawers, and empty protein shakes strewn over the kitchen counter. 

"Thank you for helping. Hope will be back from her aunt's next week so you so that have to watch me cough shit up" 

Josie grabs her arm with a frown, pulling her close so they're side by side. 

"Hey, it's ok. I'm glad I could help. Do you feel better?" 

Penelope nods. 

"Ok" Josie pulls her into a hug and Penelope nuzzles into her neck. 

"Hey Josie" she feels the warm Huff of Penny's breathe against her neck. 

"Mmmm" she hums back. 

"You take my breath away" 

"Oh my god" Josie pushes her away as Penelope falls back with a cackle. 

  


* * *

She holds the breath, letting it roil around like a small storm inside of her, and breathes out. 

“I’m sorry,” she says, wiping at her face, mixing tears with sweat into dry sticky trails. 

“I know you hate it when I cry” 

* * *

21.

  


Josie is running. Faster and harder than she's ever run before. Hope’s words chase themselves in her head. 

"Penny's in hospital." 

The summer is heavy and stifling, so the sudden change into the pale and icy hospital foyer makes Josie shiver. She hurries to the front desk, where she is given a room number and a visitors badge. She grips the sticky plastic tightly as she follows a winding stark white maze to Penelope. 

When she reaches Penelope’s room, she’s greeted by the soft sound of pumping machines pumping air noisily into Penelope's lungs. 

Hope is already there, holding Penelope’s hand. They’re gazing softly at each other, Penelope’s eyes are dull and Hope’s eyes glitter with unshed tears. 

They turn to her when they hear her enter. She stands awkwardly, wanting to leave, knowing she's broken their moment, but it doesn't matter because Penelope is smiling at her and waving her closer with the hand that's not holding Hope's. 

"Hi JoJo" it's quiet over the machines. 

As Josie walks over to the other side of the bed Hope lets go of Penelope’s hand and clears her throat. 

"I'll give you a minute. I need to grab some food. Josie, you want anything from the cafeteria?" 

Josie shakes her head and Penelope gives a wheezing laugh 

"Good choice JoJo. The food here is shit" she says as Hope leaves the room. 

Josie tries to smile, but it feels broke and jagged as she looks down at Penelope. She's so small on the hospital bed, her face pale even against the bleached white hospital sheets. She looks thin and there is an unnerving stillness to her. 

"God, who even catches a cold in summer" Penelope’s voice is raspy and almost indistinguishable over the jarring motor of the ventilator. 

It makes Josie laugh as she strokes Penelope’s hand, but it soon turns into a sob. 

"Hey, don't cry JoJo. It's ok" 

Josie feels wetness on her face. Another small sob escapes her at Penelope's words. 

"It's not ok. You're dying" 

Penelope's reaches for her hand, and grabs it. It's cold, brittle like bird bones. She looks so tired - the year of drugs and therapies and of waiting on a donor that never came. 

"I am" It's soft and so accepting and final. Josie can feel her eyes getting wetter. 

"It sucks JoJo, but I'm so glad to have met you. So glad that you were in my life" 

  


* * *

“It’s just really hard sometimes” 

The weight of the summer is bearing down on her. It's stifling, and oppressive. The skies are now a muted grey. 

Josie closes her eyes and lets the small sob escape her, she feels a tear fall down her face onto the dirt of Penelope's grave. The Earth soaks it up, somewhere in the back of her mind she wonders if Penelope can feel her tears. 

* * *

22.

  


Penelope died on a Wednesday, quietly in the morning with a smile on her face. 

Josie and Hope attended her funeral on Friday, mouths pinched and eyes dulled from crying. After the wake, they made their way together onto the edge of the Park’s backyard giving Mrs Park a moment of reprieve after all the guests had left. 

Josie inhales deeply at the joint that Hope passes to her and hums quietly to herself while she watches Hope stare despondently into space. 

"You know I was in love with her? 

Hope turns to her sharply, mouth slightly agape as she looks at Josie with shock and a little bit of horror. It’s so comical, the great Hope Michaelson looking so surprised, that Josie can’t help but laugh before continuing. 

"I was so angry at you. I thought you were taking her away. But she was so happy, you made her so happy.” 

She leans over, handing the last nub of the joint to Hope and uses that moment to squeeze Hope’s hand while smiling warmly. 

“Thank you” 

  


* * *

Josie wipes at her eyes again before slowly breathing in. The air throttles until finally it fills her lungs. She holds it and let’s it out in a slow steady stream before opening her eyes. She leans back hard into Penelope's gravestone for a moment, feeling it’s presence against her back. She breathes in again, and relaxes against it. 

“I feel like I do this every time. You’re just good to cry on Penny” Josie says softly. Though she still feels a melancholy, it feels lighter and the corners of her mouth upturn in a hint of a smile. 

The sun is setting and peeks through the clouds, casting a soft glow over the cemetery. 

It's beautiful. 

Overhead there is a rumble of thunder as the skies open. Josie turns her face towards the sky as droplets of water come down cooling her body, and washing away her tears. 

The stifling heat of summer slowly fades into the background as the heatwave is broken by the small summer rainstorm. Other visitors to the cemetery begin dashing towards the covers. Josie doesn't, instead she turns her face towards the skies, letting the cooling rain wash over her. She gets up, pushing herself off the ground and opens her arms wide, trying to catch the rain. A few of the stragglers look at her oddly, but she doesn't care. 

She looks down at the gravestone again, the rain and fading light seem to make it sparkle with the small droplets that make themselves at home on the surface. 

"I gotta go Penny, otherwise I'm going to get soaked" 

She pauses, and bends down to give it a gentle kiss. 

"Love you" 

Josie follows the path back towards the short wrought iron gate and she lets out a chuckle as she is suddenly reminded of a memory tucked away with other memories of hot pavement, warm summer nights and other fond things. 

  


_“It’s not important”_

_Penelope grabs her hand and twines their fingers together. Her hands are sticky from perspiration. Josie squeezes Penelope’s hand gently and they walk together, the path before them distorting and flickering before them in the heat._

_As they walk down the boiling tarmac path, the skies darken slightly with clouds, guided over them by a cool breeze. Suddenly the skies open, bringing down light droplets of rain. Josie makes to run for the small line of shopfronts nearby, but is pulled to a stop by Penelope._

_Josie turns and looks at her curiously. Penelope isn’t looking at her, instead her eyes are closed and her face is turned to the sky. She’s smiling._

_“Penny. Come on. You’ll get sick and then your mum will kill me!”_

_Penelope cracks an eyelid open and looks at Josie._

_“Who even gets a cold in summer?”_

_Josie giggles, but pulls at Penelope’s hand, dragging her underneath the eaves of the nearest store. The light patter of rain becomes heavier, filling the space between them with the indistinct rhythm of summer rain on a hot roof, trickling merrily into tin gutters._

_Penelope hums lightly, playing with Josie’s fingers._

_"In my next life, I want to come back as a raindrop in summer. Sweet, perfect and full of relief."_

_“You’re perfectly sweet already”_

_Josie says with a laugh, squeezing her hand as they watch the rain wash away the heat of summer for a moment._

**Author's Note:**

> To dying ships *raises glass*. As always, any comments and criticisms would be greatly appreciated so I can fix me writings :)
> 
> *Edited for some spelling


End file.
